Dr Evil is So Fortunate
by Batholith Fetish
Summary: I love the relationship between Scott and Dr. Evil, I just had to write something about it! This is a oneshot song-fic about Dr. Evil's feelings for Scott. It has some swearing, but come on, this is Dr. Evil and Scott we're talking about!:


Batholith Fetish: (sigh) This is what happens when I have an Austin Powers movie marathon and watch each movie over ten times each. Scott is one of my favorite characters, and I love watching the on and off love-hate relationship he has with his father, Dr. Evil. Sometimes it seems as if Dr. Evil doesn't love Scott, especially with the way he treated him in the first movie, but all in all I believe he truly loves him. I especially like the relationship Scott has with his mother, Frau, and I might make a story about them too, but right now I'm focusing on Scott and Dr. Evil.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Austin Powers movies, nor do I own any of the characters. I also don't own the song, So Fortunate. Adema does.

I hate my son, Scott Evil. Or at least, that's how I make it look. Hey, I'm frickin' evil and planning world domination, for god's sake! Throw me a frickin' bone, here! Evil people aren't supposed to express their love, thank you very much.

_I never thought I was strong enough_

_To handle raising my only son_

_You'll always fear what you've never done_

_I hope he'll know me when I come home_

Why Frau decided to pretend Scott was my atificial son, I'll never know. I feel kind of bad about making her go through her pregnacy alone, but hey, evil called.

Anyways, the day I first saw Scott, I was overcome by the sight of my very own child. I needed a hug, badly! Imagine my disappointment when he rejected me. It was only expected, I was a complete stranger to him, and he's probably felt abandoned by me his whole life, so it was natural that he wouldn't be too happy to see me. But I'm evil, and all my feelings must fuel into rage and revenge. Pretty soon, I started talking to him in ways I never would have thought to say to my son. I refused to progress with him in group, I acted as if it were nothing when Austin Powers held him at gunpoint, and I even went as far as to call him a "little shit". Okay, I'll admit that was a little harsh, but it was the first thing that came to my mind on short notice to try and cover myself up.

_Nothing's gonna change my love for you_

Ah yes, then the talk show. That didn't exactly go as well as I'd hoped. But everything I said to Scott was true. He wasn't evil enough. In fact, he was barely evil. He was a good person, and I could see that. So why did I keep trying to change who he was?

The second time I saw Scott, I noticed a lot had changed about him. He looked more...emo and gothic. Kind of depressed, actually. His orange hair was now dyed black and blue, his once bright clothes traded in for black, dull ones. Still, as we talked more, I noticed he was becoming more evil, if only slightly.

Then Mini-Me came into my life. He completed me. He was everything to me and more. He was like me in every way. But that was just it. I didn't want a replica of myself, I wanted someone different, someone new, someone more...like Scott. But I couldn't let anyone see that. So I pretended Mini-Me was the one for me. And although he was wonderful, he wasn't my son.

From that point on, Scott's jealousy towards my love for Mini-Me became evident. So much for "I hate you, Dad!" Still, was painful to see my son getting lower and lower in spirits at the feeling of being unloved. Thank god he had Frau, or the worst might have happened.

_I love my child_

_He's got his mother's smile_

_I'm so fortunate, so fortunate_

_Life can get tight_

_But I will make it right_

_I'm so fortunate, so fortunate_

When I came back from space, Scott was still good, although he looked happier and wasn't gothic anymore. But all that changed in a matter of time. When I was in jail, I couldn't believe my ears when Frau spoke to me. Yes, I knew he felt neglected, but I never expected his longing for my love and to make me proud force him to go as far as becoming evil, something he never wanted to be, for the sake of me. It made me happy and sad at the same time. More sad than happy, actually, but of course I'm evil, and can't let that show.

The minute I saw Scott for the third time, his hair was falling out. That was quite a shock, I mean, woah! Then he gave me frickin' sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads, something I've wanted since I was defrosted. My evil exterior melted, though, when he said he loved me. I couldn't help it, I loved him too. My relationship with Mini-Me went downhill from there, to the point where he joined Austin Power's side.

My evilness already halfway melted with my public expression of love for Scott, all it took was for me to find out that Austin, my sworn arch-enemy, was really my brother all along. My evil completely melted away, just in time for Scott to turn fully evil. Ironic, isn't it, how I was evil and Scott was good, and then I turned good while Scott turned evil?

_I had to learn what meant more to me_

_My family became everything_

_I miss you more than you'll ever know_

_I wish that I could just leave, come home_

And now Scott is evil. I don't know what's going to happen now. I don't want to have to fight my only, precious son, but I fear I may have no choice.

_I love my child_

_He's got his mother's smile_

_I'm so fortunate, so fortunate_

_Life can get tight_

_But I will make it right_

_I'm so fortunate, so fortunate_

Batholith Fetish: Hmm...not bad. Kind of sweet, in a way. And this song fits Dr. Evil perfectly. I hope this explains Dr. Evil's feelings for Scott better than the movies hinted. And there's a question hanging in the air about what will happen in the fourth movie. Can't wait until it comes out! :) You know, I usually hate song-fics, but this song fits Dr. Evil so well, I just had to do something about it! And I didn't want to write too much, so a song-fic it was. Hope it was to your enjoyment, this a little break for me from my other stories.


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